Mostly every mother has this clear picture in her mind about how she wants to bring up her children. Yet, in the rush of events of becoming a first-time mom, a lot remains fogged due to lack of experience.
For me, the birth of my first child was a milestone I managed to meet before I turned 30. Actually, I was not quite ready for a child, yet we as a couple decided to have one because I also firmly believed that if I grew any older, it would be impossible for me to have the patience to raise any kids.
A lot went haywire and in retrospect, I feel that my little Nik and dear husband were at the receiving end most of the times. I was like, if I am going to have a kid, I rather raise him to be that perfect kid who every mother would envy. (I am laughing at my naivety of having such a goal.)
It was really presumptuous of me to think that kids are a report card of a mother’s performance. (I know for sure that some mothers still think so, but thankfully I have come a long way since.) Below are a few things which I did differently the second time around –
Routine setting & potty training
My parents really got to my nerves to start early potty training for my little one. And in hindsight, I think I did a decent job of training him to near flawlessness while he was still only 9 months. But then one fine day, he forgot everything. That was when my doctor told me that biologically until the kids turn two you can never be sure. So yes this time around I am taking it easy.
Ensure cleanliness but don’t be paranoid
My doc says that a little exposure to dirt is a medium for antibodies to get into the kids’ bodies and strengthen their immunity. Over sanitization actually is a reason for low immunity in the current generation of kids. But know that dirt and dust are different from filth.
Less of a disciplinarian
Frankly, my sister was the last kid I had dealt with until I became a mother myself. So the idea of disciplining my kid was a matter of paramount importance for me. I confess now I was really stupid. My focus should only have been to instil positive habits.
Tad more possessive
As mentioned above, I was that radical mom who thought that I need not be like those regular moms who can’t stop doting upon their bubs. I profoundly apologise to all the doting mothers of this world. I I have learnt my lesson and now stand as the flag bearer of those extremely possessive doting mothers who see cuteness in everything their kids do.
So yes, my mantra to all the new moms out there would be
Worry less, love more! Fret less, chill more!